2019

2018
Was not the best of the years in my life
I continued to share a lot and maybe some I should not have
seems computer and writing is a habit.

Tonight I turn the computer on
and thankful for so many that send words of encouragement.

Year ended with the last shot in my knee, the most painful one and fluid just returns, guess that is what it does.   Might not seek this route again.

This one will continue doing all she can to help the issues arising  until I grow weary of doing so
but vow not to leave my much-loved cottage.

Will post less, unless I see something with the camera I cannot resist.

Weary of sharing aging issues
all apart of life continuing when you are ancient.
Very fortunate that most did not surface until in my 70,s

My family will be pleased to hear this
but when they are my age, some of my words will surface

Thank you again
all who warm me with their words.

Wish I could hug you.

At the moment
I want a clear and quiet mind and an open heart.
Sounds easier than done.

No downscaling so much has been done for several years.   I what is left and the memories that arise.

SO HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EACH OF YOU
FOLLOW YOUR HEART IN ALL MATTERS.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP
MANY OF YOU HAVE BROUGHT
AND NEW ONES SEEM TO CONTINUE TO  FIND ME.

ON THIS DAY

BE STILL

BE QUIET

;LET THE MIND REST

DISCOVER WHO YOU REALLY ARE



Sounds like good advice
for this one

last Hydraulic Acid shot last Friday
so glad it is over.

MORNING

A morning filled with fog and frost.

Now the sun is shining and beautiful

 

Remembering

My youngest granddaughter
so
musically talented.

Plays many instruments

I remember her playing her play guitar as a youngster
and took her to the local  guitar store and bought her a real one
she was so proud and repeatedly said to me
"grandma this is a real one, did it cost a lot of money?)

A memory surfaced as I heard she is now playing the Saxophone.

So proud of you Amelia

Love, grandma

Today

Wrote a post on returning from a second Hydraulic Acid shot in the knee.
Yes wrote it and then somehow deleted my sharing.

All is well, more fluid drained and told I have osteoarthritis and draining knee of fluid will be something happening more then I expected.

This shot has not given me the pain I experienced with the first shot.   Next week 3rd and last shot
and hopefully helps me for 6 months.

Hoping for the best and seems Hydraulic Fluid is made from Rooster Cones :)

I no longer do FaceBook and like the simplicity of Instagram
posted an image today of  me holding  my first grandchild who has given me my first greatgrandchild

Brene Brown
tells me

"Talk to yourself
the way you would
talk to someone you loved"

A New Way and the Knee Shots

There was a time that I rearranged my furniture often.

Not anymore
but
with me directing will try.

I like it like this, only one chair too many.  I bought a new recliner when I went to the awful place, really like it, goes up and down easy. The older recliner is probably 30 years old and my son when
he visits likes to sit in it.  It was too big for me.

Too many chairs, but - one I rocked my babies in, another favorite picture is me holding Jimmy in
this chair when he was a toddler.  A pair of wing chairs are 60 years old and better constructed
than most today.   So 98% memory pieces and must mention books that are piled in every room
and I must go through them, love them all.
Helper took me to have hair washed, on the way I told him "take me home, not going through with this, so weary of these procedures, now thankful he replied "little one I am not taking you home
we are going through with this, now I thank him.  Jamie met us at hair wash place and with me from then on   My first Hydraulic Acid shot was the most painful shot I remember.  A lot of fluid drained off of knee before the shot.   That night I was awake most of the night and continued on until 1:00 the next day with
pain.   Part of the reason I did not want to take medication and finally for a day and a half am taking
and much better.   Next shot is due on Tuesday and one 10 days later

Hoping for relief for a number of months when the procedure is done,
Ashamed of sharing how I behave but do not like all that is happening and nothing I can do about it but "accept and helpful son says "breathe."  I want to wash my own hair but cannot at this time......

So, I am now ancient and do not behave well :)

My nurse doctor said part of the solution from Rooster Cones :) must read about that.

Ice

I wake in the night and small vaporizer by my bed is off, my thought, it is out of the water.
Not so, I turn on light and no current.
It is 4:30 AM, I am up and in a few hours this is the view

on this country rural road, no electricity happens often but took until afternoon to come on.

At 8:00 AM, one arrives with hot biscuits and my N,Y, Times at the end of the long road.
Church breakfast and she thought of me.  Next, helper girl calls "are you alright, do you have
electricity?  She tells me her and friend knowledgeable about gas logs (that will not come on
will arrive soon.  Logs not coming on and her friend gives me the number  I have not been
able to find of the son of a special friend who is head of the electrical department.  I call him and on
this day not making house calls, but he arrives soon to check on me and logs.  Starts them not
in the normal way, he shares a problem and he does not want me to be in a cold house as the temperature is dropping and will check on me later.

So thankful and how to put into words How Very Thankful for those I know in this small community
So thank you to Lana, Michelle, Randy, and Sam - to this one you are Angels.

Electricity came on an hour ago and nice to have hot tea, soup and 1/2 of sandwich from the
grandmother's small iron skillet (like it better than the toaster.

Told a lot of trees down from ice and across my drive and visitors around them.

So day is ending, heat on and I am so very thankful. for those who thought of me.

MY DREAM

In my next life maybe
you will find me here

In this weekend's New York Times an article
with the Title
An ancient corner of Italy finds itself at the world's doorstep.

It is Saturday morning and will just continue sharing.

Tabor, thank you always for your kind comments. on my recent entry.

Another night of severe pain and wonder without the lowest dose of Hydrocodone what would it be
like.   So I continue onward with thankfulness for much and do not like a lot at this time of life.
One who takes me on errands says "I do not want to grow old and I reply "good luck."
My son tells me often "mama nothing remains the same and life is always changing."

My helper girl last night came in with a small bag, contained tea and honey and said to replace some
she uses of mine and I replied: "no way do you do this."   We sat at the big table sharing, she is complimentary of much I have done in this now long life and I compliment her.  She is very intelligent and her help so appreciated.   Her husband and son she lost, it was tragic, I listen to her
share and it seems our sharing makes my pain level less.

Cold, but as I look out the window, the sun may break through the clouds.   When it is very cold and the sun shines it just seems much warmer.

The thought arises should I make myself go to another special one to have hair washed.  Probably not a good idea. when I get up from this desk and walking difficult, I think where is my mind and plan on going on Tuesday for hair before doctor appointment.

I do not like having someone else wash my hair, but no longer can do it.  The special hairdresser
did Jamie's hair for her wedding.   Cindy not in on Monday, so Tuesday morning before doctor
appointment will be good for me.   I will get a ride to shop and Jamie can pick me up then
instead of at home, at the moment sounds like a good plan.

Need to unload washer, straighten kitchen and get off of my friend "the computer."

Thanks for listening....

Here By The Woods

One day sunny and beautiful
at the moment a cold spell.
A bad 24 hours with stomach, but on the mend
Finally appointments for knee injections.
They are called Hydraulic Acid, what you use at the end and sounds like they are for a car.

First one is next Tuesday afternoon and hopefully, some relief begins.
Another shot following week and then the last after Christmas.

Jamie is taking me and so thankful for her time.

Jimmy is in Saigon and some pictures sent.

My helper made a favorite recipe "French Coconut Pie" and so good.

She shared an image of Ginger Bread House she is making and do not think I would have the patience.

Soon a new year and the thoughts arise how fast this year has gone by and so much happened to me
But so thankful to be in my cottage by the woods

Two down and one more next week

Second shot at 1:30 today and at the moment nowhere near the pain as last week.

I thought knee swollen but it was full of fluid once again and was drained.

Asked "what will make me not have fluid,"  told you will probably always have the fluid
since this is OsteoArthritis.   Hydraulic Acid shot, slow release last about 6 months, fluid will
probably have to be removed every couple of months if causes pain - ans it does.

Nurse daughter told me that Hydraulic Acid is made from Rooster Cones, interesting.

Thankful it is over and Jamie being with me.   Next week will have my special assistant here at home
go with me if she is available.   If not will go,  just me and act grown up.

I no longer  do Facebook, like Instagram and posting old photo's and new ones are taken with my camera

Above image is the ancient one holding Jessica as a baby, my first grandchild who a year ago gave me my first
great-grandson.

So happy at the moment no pain like last week from the shot.

"Talk to yourself
like you would talk to someone
you love"

Brene Brown

This Day

Torrential rain all night and still falling.

Lunchtime, have to eat

roast beef - gouda cheese, tomato, and basil, toasted in a small iron skillet - so good.

these with Salmon dip

Something excellent for me I just discovered on Amazon,  a cream that dissolves on your skin and even helping the
Shingles on my face.
Using it all over my body daily.

My scales say 101 lbs, 11 lb gain in a month with help of an appetite pill.   I will stop
the pill when I reach 105 lbs, my goal is 110 lbs
.
Horrible pain and taking 3 times a day, low dose of Hydrocodone.  Helping but never anything
this strong in the past, but need it.'