Books by the old Leather Chair

  • Snow In The Summer
  • My Bible
  • The Power of Silence
  • What Comes Next and to Like It
  • Encore Provence
  • A Year in Provence

Wednesday, September 14, 2011


This post was written 3 years ago.
This journal was a new venture
A conversation with one of my daughters recently reminded me of what I had written
Just looked it up.
My how time is going by so rapidly
These words still are important to me.

"Will you just listen to me"
all of us need this.....
Yes, I do but need to
recognise that my children,
 grandchildren and many I
come in contact with need this.
Me - listening with no

If you can sit and just listen - you are very special and gifted. Do many people listen anymore? When I am talking to someone on the telephone it seems in a few minutes they are saying "someone on another line" oh how I dislike - call waiting. Or someone is at the door or just I gotta go. When you are at the doctors office and you share it seems in a few minutes they are looking at their watch. Or you have the gut feeling that you better make it quick and not forget anything as they are going out the door.

I can remember the years I took my mother to the doctor. She called that her day. A doctor visit, a few special errands and lunch. I remember so well as I drove and she talked. So many times in her later years she would say "please just listen to me". I would be thinking, I have heard this story before. Lately, I think I am repeating my stories.

Surrounded by some children and grandchildren for a few days, it seems this is what I want to say "please just listen to me" let me ramble on about present, future and past. Do not interrupt, just listen. Some of family listen and others need for me to listen. It is a fine line. This early morning do not want to sound critical. I do know that maybe one of the pleasures of having a journal is that you write your thoughts. We do not know who in this universe is listening. Or if anyone is listening, guess what - it really does not matter. Something to think about!!!

I love listening to my young grandchildren share. Smile at the comments they make. They are so observant and honest. I have always cut my granddaughters bangs. They were beginning to look so shabby and I took Amelia to a shop where mom had a coupon for a reduced price. That was 6 weeks ago. When she was visiting last Friday she commented "grandma you need to take me back to Great Clips". I was amazed that she remembered the shop name. Also came up to me and said "grandma do you like boys" I thought for a moment and just said "do you" she replied "no they are mean and I just like girls'. So I listen to her and smile.

I can remember a time when I was deeply involved in church work. For a number of years I did outreach work. Reaching out to home bound and those in the hospital. These were all elderly people. Oh, how happy they were to see me. They would talk and share and I would listen. I always felt loved when I left these special people.

On my recent plane trip to Michigan for my sister's funeral I sat next to a lady and we shared.The flight passed so quickly. I listened to her and she listened to me - endlessly.
We exchanged cards and I am looking forward to having lunch with her in the next week or two.

Again, I wonder does anyone listen anymore? Does anyone take the time to listen?
Is it just me noticing this.
If you do listen, you surely have a special gift.

The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them. Ralph Nichols

Listening looks easy but it is not simple
Cuban Proverb


Jessi Cotterill said...

Oh my...listening is the skill everybody should learn. I'm so tired of people who don't listen and I have to repeat my words again and again til I feel like I'm having a repetitive disorder.

I made one friend on a plane as well. We've been friends for about seven years now.

Have a nice day, Ern...
Love from Jessi

Darlene said...

Listening is becoming a lost art in this age of hurry, hurry, hurry. I remember my grandmother and her sister sitting at the breakfast table talking for hours. They actually listened to each other. Does that happen anymore?

We are all so busy that we don't take time for the simple pleasures.

Tabor said...

Listening is always a skill that we need to nurture. I can remember decades ago at work taking courses in developing listening skills, and I know they teach it a the primary school level as well. It is our human weakness with all the new technologies to be distracted. I will try to listen more.

Beverly said...

I have read this post and the one after it. One thing nice about your journal is that no one interrupts us.

I know that sometimes I start to talk, and after about three or four words, they turn to someone and begin to talk themselves. Makes me so mad...

kenju said...

You are so right; everyone needs to feel as if they are being heard. Unfortunately, the older I get, the more I notice younger people don't really want to hear what I have to say. Grandchildren listen, but it is because they are respectful, not because they have any great interest. With blogging, you get comments that indicate someone is listening! LOL

Anonymous said...

This is another reminder for me to be a better listener.
I must confess I asked my daughter to get to the point recently and she let me know I had hurt her feelings. Of course, I apologized.

the wild magnolia said...

Yes, this is it, we need to listen, we need to be listened too.

I enjoyed this so much.

The last several posts have not made it to my Google Reader. I'll check on that.

Laura said...

Oh dear one, listening, truly listening is a sacred art, don't you think? A beautiful post, thank you for sharing it again since I did not know you when you first wrote it:-)

mermaid said...

You've given us a gift today. To understand and be understood. That is human connection.

sallysmom said...

Thank you for this. I wish with all my heart I had my mom here so I could listen to her talk. Maybe, we all should think that in the blink of any eye the person who needs us to listen will be gone. And we will be wishing we could hear them talk again.

sally said...

Many years ago, I was told that you can not learn in life if you are talking, you must listen. That has proven to be very true, and being a good friend, sometimes you just need to say hello-some people have no one to listen to them-especially the ones who are care takers.
Thanks for the reminder! I hope you have some valued listeners in your life Ernestine.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Sandra, Laura, SallysMom and Sally,
thanks for visiting...

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Kaveri, thank you...
you are always giving me gifts
with your special words

Sharon said...

People who know me comment about how well I listen, and I appreciate people who return the favor. Now I stop talking if someone stops listening. It means that some conversations are very short.

Sky said...

listening is, indeed, becoming a lost art. good reminder to us all, ernestine. thanks!