Books by the old Leather Chair

  • Snow In The Summer
  • My Bible
  • The Power of Silence
  • What Comes Next and to Like It
  • Encore Provence
  • A Year in Provence

Saturday, June 1, 2013

58 Is So Young

I remember well the early evening of years ago .
We were on our way out to dinner
several miles from our farm at that time.

Heard the siren of the ambulance
as we pulled over to the side of the road.

I told my husband
to turn around and follow it.

He shook his head
as I said "if it turns on their road I know it is my father."

He muttered some words thinking I was wrong.
The car was turned around and
the ambulance continued as we followed behind
as it turned on their street.

As the car pulled into
the drive
I opened the car door with the car still moving.

My father had died of a massive heart attack.
It was his third and the longer life has gone on
I  realize how 58 years is so young.

My father's father died of an accident when he was 12 years old.
He was the second oldest and had 5 sisters.  Helped his mother at this young age
 by working as a caddy in the local park and later in a restaurant.

He was a hard worker and the relationship I needed and desired as I grew up was
not there until his last years.  I remember well my much loved grandmother telling
him to be kinder to me.

I was out of school and working at age 17
in the corporate office of one of our major car manufacturers in Michigan.
My associates were much different then those of my father at that time.
By the world's standard they were achievers with high incomes.
He was very proud of me and at the same time there may have been some envy.
I did not understand and it caused me a lot of sadness.

I realize now that doors he desired never opened for him and at a young age
they did  for me.

With marriage a young couple was the American dream come true.
With hard work and thriving  economy at that time afforded us business opportunities
that those in my family and my mates did not experience. 

I look back and realize that being able to live a number of different lifestyles
has made me who I am.  I have sat on the creek bank eating a hot dog with my workers
and have had dinner in the Governor's mansion.   Love to garden in my old worn clothes
and at one time wore designer clothes.   None of this makes any differance to me and feel
comfortable with all.   At this time love my old clothes with my hoe in hand
 and have no desire for anything else.   I might add - just my health...

Achievements many times cause jealousy in families.  I seemed to
experience a lot of this towards me at a young age and even through my
adult years and some I even recognize now.

In my younger years so much I did not understand
and still do not.
As time goes by I try very hard to
 accept others as they are and try  not try to figure out why.  

He loved and enjoyed my children so very much. 
  During his last weeks Jamie had just learned to walk and
the memory is always there of how he would place the hat he wore on her little head
as she walked to him.

He was born on June 13th and if he was living today
he would be 100 years old and my mother would be 95.

On their wedding day
ages 17 and 23....

14 comments:

lil red hen said...

Hugs, as your memories come.

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

What a thoughtful, loving post, filled with memories and thoughts then and now.

Love and hugs to you ~ FlowerLady

Tabor said...

Until we are old enough to understand the journey of our parents I think we fail to understand our relationship to them. You are wise and this wisdom has earned you the wealthy lifestyle you once had and the peaceful lifestyle you now enjoy. There is something inside of you from each of your parents.

Mary @ Colony Mountain Folk Art Dolls said...

A beautiful couple; can see something of each in you.

the wild magnolia said...

the look of the people in old black and white photos. nostalgia and a certain melancholy sweeps over me when i look at my old photographs. most of mine are lost in the wind.

your mom and dad were beautiful and handsome. you are blessed to have photo memories.

Judy said...

58 is way to young--my Mother was 53. I can remember my Daddy being a bit snarky to me when I got a job with the large car manufacturer in Flint. Then when I got my first car through them, at a huge discount, he said, "Ah--don't you think you're hot--now you got a Buick." I wish he just would have been proud of me instead. Good memories are also in our past--doesn't it feel weird to know that we remember people who were born 100 or more years ago? Guess that means we are old?

Wisewebwoman said...

It is extraordinary how we hang on to the hurtful words, isn't it. I know I do. I understood my parents a long time ago and feel compassion but still some of the words still haunt me.

I love your parents, their hope and joie de vivre in that picture!

You cherish the important things.

As I try to do.

XO
WWW

Mrs A said...

Good memories for you. My father died at the same age from a long illness, terrible for him and for all his family. I was a week short of my seventeenth birthday so my own children have no knowledge of him. Fifty-eight is so very young. Lovely photo. Mrs A

Sallysmom said...

Reading this brought tears to my eyes. I wonder do we ever really appreciate our parents as much as we should until after they are gone? A beautiful and touching piece, Ernestine.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Charlotte, Lorraine, Tabor, Mary, Sandy, Judy, WWW, Mrs A and Sallysmom, thanks always
for visiting..

Found In Folsom said...

Loved this post...58 is young....a very profound post..may you live long with sound health...

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Found in Folsom - thank you so very much..

madwomandancing said...

What a beautiful couple. And this is a touching post. Ernestine, I suppose no matter how old or young we are, we are still trying to piece things together in reference to the meaning of the relationships in our lives. I know I am. My mother and I were not able to enjoy a good relationship and I will probably always feel sad about that. I had an easier time of things with my father and am grateful to have had some time with him, despite his incapacitation with Alzheimer's, for the months after my mother died. I'm thinking about you. I couldn't sleep tonight (again), and decided I'd visit you for a while!

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Ellen, we are always on the same page...