Books by the old Leather Chair

  • Snow In The Summer
  • My Bible
  • The Power of Silence
  • What Comes Next and to Like It
  • Encore Provence
  • A Year in Provence

Saturday, October 12, 2013

At This Moment

She walks in her garden
cane in hand
and takes her foot
to push landscaping boards
to make flower garden a little smaller.
The same thing is done for the small vegetable garden
and next Spring it will be smaller.
It is beyond her imagination to think of a tomato that is  not plucked from her vine,
cucumber picked along with lettuce and squash and it is only for one.

All that is loved with a passion is surveyed
and words this morning made the comment
"when you were planting I wonder how you would take care of it all."
None are aware of her deep pleasure in what she does
and that it was a dream come true
to return to her woods.

With 6 weeks of not taking care of everything her self
even though a little help she told what to do and
that now seems to have disappeared
it is evident it is not up to her standard
as she looks at her surroundings with tears in her eyes.

Seems at this time difficult to find another who would help her dig in the dirt,
maybe stopping for a glass or cup of tea, not talking and just enjoying nature
for a few hours.

Yesterday gravel arrived for road and one delivering looked around and said
"your surroundings are beautiful" also one who came to give a bid for something
to cover old truck - made the same remark....
and old truck you will just have to continue the same like your mistress as not adding cover.

Looked online at retirement options in the big city
and this is not her.    She prayed and all fell in place to return to the land she loved.
Now is the time to accept being surrounded by untamed nature
and as special son has said many times
"lower your standards, rest more and just accept."
It is not easy for this one
and ashamed to admit this truth.
So time will tell what is to be
as all falls in place naturally.....

Family weary of hearing these remarks
but in years to come
they may remember the words
or choose not to remember
and maybe think she has lost it.

At the moment
one in Paris and it sounds Divine

One on a short trip to the mountains with two little ones and finally settled in a nice
dwelling after discovering first choice was covered with mold :(
Another sharing about plans when his niece visits soon and a trip to a Thai beach.
Another one's mind is filled with next years wedding plans
and another is probably out filling her cupboards for next weeks work from home.

This one receives their notes,
smiles, sometimes shakes her head
as their lives and desires are so different
from the matriarch in this family.

Beautiful days,
leaves will soon begin to color,
Callie hardly takes her eyes of this one
and even with  all that has happened lately
she feels she has been showered with blessings.


Mary @ Colony Mountain Folk Art Dolls said...

"Untamed nature." I like it... so much better for the environment, I think. I enjoyed this post so much and take a lot of inspiration from it.

Tabor said...

Thinking small is a good thing. You like things more small will be more rewarding for you. Your family is wonderful to send their great stories!

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Dear Tabor and Mary, you make me smile and your online friendship is treasured more then you will ever know...

Balisha said...

Just finished reading and rereading this post. I've had to let my woods become "untamed nature" and I think the wild life enjoys it more.It's more peaceful for them without me disturbing them.

It's hard to change, but we must if we want to continue having a life of quality. I try so hard to prevent falling by changing the kind of slippers and shoes I wear, tossing throw rugs, holding on to railings, no climbing etc....but then there are always accidents.

Life isn't what I expected years ago. So hard to find someone who will help for just a few hours. Wouldn't it be nice to have a helper who would have time for tea? The world is spinning so fast and sometimes I feel like we should keep out of the way.So we continue on doing what we can and trying to (as you son said) lower our standards.
I wish we were neighbors...I'd love to join you for a cup of tea.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Balisha, thank you and we are much alike :) going forward and we may be different - that's alright :)
know God is so good and always takes care of everything and will continue to do so.

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

What a heartfelt post. I, also, have been thinking about having someone who would love gardening and want to help, for the love of it, for lunches, cookies, handmade goodies.

I already live with 'untamed nature', I just need help with it.

Love and hugs to you dear Ernestine. You inspire me with your thoughts, you encourage me too.


Sharon said...

Ernestine, your surroundings will look different in the spring when everything is new again. This time of year it's a good idea to let things rest. You will feel stronger and renewed when it is time to decide what and where to plant. Now you have time to enjoy things just as they are ~

lil red hen said...

I enjoyed this so much, but it also makes me sad. This summer has been more tiring to me and I realize we need to cut back on the farm work. But as long as the farmer feels like working, I'll be by his side even though my feet may drag a little slower and my shoulders ache a bit more. God bless you, Ernestine.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Lorraine, Sharon and Charlotte,
thank you
and as I reread this post
I think
how sad you sound One Woman
and you really
have a peaceful heart
and smiling at the moment :)

Anonymous said...

I can feel your frustration and know it myself, in having to slow my pace on days when I do not feel well. It is so very difficult for one who has been so active all her life. I am thinking of you. I do love your phrase, "untamed nature."